back to life, back to reality

well u guys...sooo ya, its been a hell of a long time since ive written. i guess i got too tied up in my work and genetics and ap art and econ and all that crap. but the good news is that highschool is FINALLY over. its weird to think that most of those ppl ill never see again...theres a lot of memories to choose from i guess. but i just have to say that i had a really good time. my senior year wasnt too shabby and we won spring sing again so that was awesome. everything about that year went pretty damn good except for prom. my best friend turned out to be a bitch with a huge ego and my prom date turned out to be a big ugly mexican asshole. o well...i guess there really is someone made for everyone cuz ther together now. woop. i looked pretty tho, well i thought at least. my dress was like a deep red and strapless and not too poofy. it was gorgeous. n then i got make up done at mac. she made me look extremely mexican lol but who cares. thats what i am. lets seeeeee o ya and grad night was so-so. we went to disneyland with a bunch of other schools...got there around midnight....left around 5:30 am, got back around 7. they turned a bunch of places into dance places like hip-hop, salsa, country lol k not. we spent most our time in the hip-hop one. THAT was interesting but fucken fun and then of course my little stupid nerea stole the guy i found there. i dont get her...i really dont. hmmm finals were finals...i didnt even bother studying for my econ one. OH and i got a 100% on my genetics project so i felt really smart. that class will be one my biggest achievments for my whole life. i was terrified when i got there...i had ALL the SMARTEST girls in my class PLUS the valedictorian lol and ya....i went into the final with an 89.7 or something...but came out with a B. but i didnt care. i was sooo proud of myself. even more that i graduated. it all went too fast. im gonna miss my uniform. my aunt said she'll give me $10 to wear my uniform on my first day of college... but thats not enough lol

lets see....o ya i recently just got back from my trip to colorado. it was pretty fun but not fun enough to write a paragraph on. but its a highlight in my summer. i got scared for a minute cuz my mom was talking about buying a house out there and so if she did that it would mean i would have to live here on my own...but luckily i have friends...lol steffan is gonna buy a house soon and shaun and his friends are gonna buy a condo in poway so both of them offered so i love them. and yes this is the shaun i talked about in my WAY early entries.

another big thing is that i saw aubrey again and finally met jason her little luvie. i cant wait to see how beautiful ur baby is aubs. i cant wait to see him. but ummmm wat do u guys want as a wedding gift cuz i have nooooo idea. a blender? a toaster? a vaccuum? lol i dont kno so keep me posted.

work is great, as usual...except that like EVERYONE is leaving. cassie, kathryn, sarah, the irish girls, thomas, ANDY, michelle, emily, marissa... this fucks up everything because all my friends are leaving for college so i figured i would still have my coldstone friends. right? wrong =( o well...at least ill still have jeremy and will. god my birthday is gonna blow lol. but ive decided that since im turning 18 im gonna go get my nose pierced so yay. andrea said she would come with me but she might flake so i gotta find a backup.

when it comes to the boy situation ive decided that i want a bf again. its been about 3 years now so i think im ready to try again. i think i was wayyyy to young the first time around. theres been a few guys that ive considered that dont really consider me back lol n the ones that do consider me, id NEVER b ther girlfriend. like sean...i dont kno y he keeps pursuing me. hes a nice guy n all but fuck hes 26 years old. ????? i dunno WHAT is going thru his mind. im not having the best of luck so i asked my friend stephen why and he said its not because guys dont like me, its just the way i carry myself. its so weird... i was telling him all about this date i went on and it was incredible how he would KNOW the way my hands were while the two of us were kissing and stuff. he tells me im a confident, independant girl but i push people away for the fear of something happening between us which is ya...also kinda true. and that i need to work on opening myself up a little bit more and just talk but lol god ive been this way for so long that i dunno how to undo it. ill get there i guess. another thing tho is that so far 3 people have asked me whats between me and will...from work. i guess ive never really thought about us that way but when i look at it, it seems like ther might be a possibility there. even michelle said she had a dream about me and will sneaking some kissies at work. i dunno, watever.

nothing much else has been going on with me lately. im just taking things as they come. its been a great summer so far but as dweeby as it sounds, i cant wait for school to start again. even if im left to deal with no friends at least ill have my school work to become addicted to...again lol. so ya...thats it for now. ill post in a few. night everyone <3